literature

Am I Heartless?

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Literature Text

I remember when I was younger
The days drew by so slowly
They went by with no feeling
I was numb

But in heed of disaster
I notice a change
I reacted in a sense of defiance
My emotions became chaotic
I'll laugh and cry with no meaning
I'll strike out in violence
No warning
But around you it's different
I regress to that state of numbness

You've changed
It's killing you
And three times now
Three times I've heard the news
I'm losing you
And I feel nothing

Thirty days this time
When will it end?
When you lay dead and cold in the ground?
The thought alone should destroy me
That you'd forsake me for the chill of the bottle
And the sting of the liquid poison
I should be in tears
Yet I can't even force one

I fear I've gone mad
To accept your destruction so easily
I know I shouldn't let this run my life
But shouldn't I at least cry?
I'm not heartless


Please tell me I'm not heartless
This is next assignment from my mentor :iconkasihamashaki: . Sry it's been so long. I've been procrastinating. I had it sorta done a while ago but then I looked back at the theme and realized I didn't exactly fit all the required points so yeah.

The theme this time was " . . . to write about something from the deepest pits of your soul. This needs to be a difficult poem to write because it should be something that is difficult for you to face. It can be as long as you wish and it needs to have beautiful vocabulary. Pour your whole self into this poem"

What I wrote doesn't exactly look like it fits the theme but it's all I could think of. Lately I've been having issues with a family member and so almost everything I write has something to do with it. Recently I've been questioning myself a lot. I've been almost fearing that I've been a hypocrite. I always say things like "People are way to spoiled these days" or "People are so mean". But then I look at myself and how I act sometimes. I'll sometimes tell myself "You're really acting greedy" And I fear that. It's really hard to face when you're being a bitch.

Btw when I wrote this on paper the first time, it was a whole lot shorter. :D
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